The air is cool, and the streets outside are glistening. Looks like it might have rained, though I’ve no idea when. Was out at a screening for the evening, and then had a needlessly complicated journey back. Don’t know if it’s better for me to save all my blogging up in one go, or to keep doing it in these small increments. Well, I guess I’ll just have to take it as it comes.

My head is still full of fevery fog. I’m hoping that this clears soon, because it’s no fun- especially as there’s nothing you can do for treatment. I took some painkillers, but just eended up feeling deeply spaced out. It just makes everything feel more intense, and slightly hallucinatory. And the fact that it’s not the kind of thing to go away after a night of discomfort really isn’t much of a relief.

Tomorrow is going to be a relaxing day. By order. I always seem to end up feeling like I’m desperate to do stuff at the points when I’m not physically capable, but I’ve got to try and get through this. I’ve got to knuckle down and try to relax (not an easy thing for me), or next week is just going to be much, much harder.

I did, at least, manage to finish the script that I’ve been working on. Whether or not it’s any good is a different story, but at least it’s done.

Food beckons, and then bed.

Okay- events are moving a little faster than usual.

I may have bagged a couple of big interviews at Edinburgh. Can’t say for what yet, but- at the least- I have people interested in getting hold of them, which is so much better than the whole “Striking in the Dark” thing. The annoying thing is, I want to be able to rush around, doing stuff. I’m working on the script to a short film that’s going very well, and I desperately want to get it finished before I have to go to Edinburgh- but I can’t push myself too hard. I’m better this morning than I have been, but there’s still that essential “Not rightness” that’s lurking around and reminding me that pain and discomfort are waiting patiently around the corner, seeing whether or not it’s their moment.

I’m also playing Doom 3 at the moment- lent to me by my friend Stevie. It’s great fun, and has some wonderfully creepy moments- but, as first person shooters go, it is a little repetetive. There’s only so many dark, badly-lit and sinister corridors you can stalk down with a gigantic sidearm before they stop being scary. Makes me remember exactly how varied, funky and genuinely nasty Half-Life was as a game, and makes me very upset that I don’t have a PC powerful enough to play the sequel. I’ve made the jump to Mac, and the lack of certain games is an unpleasent side-effect I’m just going to have to weather.

I’ve added some of my older blog entries from my site. It’s not like they’re tremendously exciting, but I thought for history’s sake, I might as well get ’em up where people can see ’em.

When I find them, I’ll put up my semi-legendary “Celluloid Highway” updates. It’s just a matter of finding the damn things…

Right. So this is working. I’m actually blogging.

There was a blog page on my website but- to be honest, I was actually quite bad at updating it. The whole point was to try and get myself writing, and it kind of failed rather spectacularly.

So what’s in my life at the moment?

Well- I’ve recently come off a gigantic burst of work. Being a freelance journalist means that you do have tremendous amounts of freedom (the freedom to be poor, the freedom to stare at yourself in the mirror and wonder “Why the hell am I doing this again?”), but it also means that “No” is the most frightening word in the history of the English language. You just can’t say it. So, I’ve had a couple of weeks when it’s just been a non-stop tide of screenings and work. I’ve gotten to the end of it, thankfully, but not for long as next Monday, I’m off to the Edinburgh Film Festival for two weeks. It’s a long time since I’ve done something like this (Last time, I journeyed across America for six weeks visiting movie locations). It’s going to be good, but it’s also going to be hard work. And the worrying thing is that I’m ill at the moment.

Just over a year ago, I got iller than I’ve ever been in my life. I had a combination of glandular fever and tonsilitis, which I really can’t recommend to anyone. It basically meant that for a solid month, I could barely do anything. I couldn’t eat without being in pain. I couldn’t drink without being in pain. There were a couple of points where my tonsils were so swollen, I started having these weird images of them swelling further and blocking my throat so I couldn’t breathe. And that was on the good days.

I got through it, but the trouble with glandular fever is that it sticks in your system. I had a brief relapse earlier this year- it tends to happen when I get very run-down. And that’s exactly why it’s happenned now. Thankfully, it’s not too bad, but there’s nothing scarier than just having to hope that your body gets well in the next few days, when you’re kind of screwed if it doesn’t.

I guess we’ll see…

Okay- Now trying it through the benificent wisdom of iJournal.

This is all slightly new for me.

Please do not adjust your set…

Okay- this is the point where I type something in just to check whether or not it’s working.

Blogging is nice. Blogging is fun. Blogging is bother for everyone…

(Back soon)

Typical. You blink, and a month passes. My whole ‘regular updates’ thing has slightly gone for a burton, mainly because of the fact that the last month has been a busy, surreal and deeply unsettling experience. Bombs on the underground, varying weather, a trip home to Cornwall, and more films than seems healthy.

I’m also now going to the Edinburgh Film Festival- as long as everything goes according to plan- so I’ve got the second half of August to look forward to as a surreal reprise of my Celluloid Highway adventure- lots of sleeping in a hostel and mooching around a city I’ve never been before

Gorillaz on the radio, steel guitar in my soul…

Did an amazing thing today- sat down and wrote. Just went ahead and wrote 6,750 words in four hours. It’s one of the biggest bits of intensive writing that I’ve done in ages- and it feels good. It feels like I can actually do this. It’s a good feeling, and I’m going to do more, mainly because deep down I know that this is what I’m supposed to do. It’s nice to feel like you have a destiny.

Got an article to write this week on the Big Summer blockbusters, and how it’s all panned out. I’ve also got five screenings in the next forty eight hours. Sometimes, fitting all the stuff into my life is a serious headache.

Another annoyance- my computer is acting a bit sluggish. I never like it when this happens. It’s always a sign of severe difficulties to come.

It’s hot. Way too hot. Not hot in the way that Las Vegas or New York is hot- but more in the non commital, slightly annoying way that London gets. The kind of temperatures reserved for a city that likes pissing off its inhabitants. George and I bought a fan on Saturday, and it’s been running almost non-stop since.

It’s been a very strange week. What was supposed to be a big “sorting out” time turned into lots of confusion, plenty of learned Japanese Kanji symbols, and an impromptu visit to a film shoot that ended with me spectacularly panicking my head off in the middle of a car park. Then a weekend break, more subbing work, and the general feeling of not having quite enough time. Something that’s becoming quite regular.

Sorry- I need a new chair, and my hands are hurting. I can’t type when it’s painful.

Well- it was almost as bad as I expected. Kind of a mixed episode (rather like the season)- when it’s actually trying to be serious and scary, it’s pretty good. When it’s trying to be funny, it’s bloody embarressing.

No. I’m not going to get upset about this. I’m almost tired of getting this worked up about a TV programme. I just need to get myself writing again. I need to get the stories in my head out into the real world. Who is no longer for me- and I can’t tell you how sad that make me feel. It’s like a long-treasured friend has decided he really doesn’t want to hang out with me anymore, and he’d far rather go and get the attention of the “cool kids”.

Am tired and slightly emotional. It’s possible that I’ve actually done a hell of a lot today, so I’m going to chill. Relax. And take a very deep, calming breath.