Home

  • “What are the 39 Steps? Answer me man, what are the 39 Steps?”

    You can always tell when you’re having a good day- annoying or ridiculous things happen, and they still don’t manage to derail you. Yesterday was my third wedding anniversary- and despite the fact that we are somewhat strapped for cash at the moment, I was able to utilise some very creative accounting and make sure that George and I had a day to remember. One of the most important things I did was not tell George any of this was happening- she got a few inklings from her Mum (thanks to me not outlining what the plan for Tuesday was), but most of it ran smoothly and she didn’t have a real idea of what we were doing until we reached our destination.

    Essentially, I picked her up from work, whisked her to Alton and onto a train, where we travelled to London and made our way to the Criterion Theatre for the matinee performance of the stage version of The 39 Steps – a show that essentially takes the Hitchcock film adaptation and produces a gloriously lunatic version of it with only four cast members. While there’s a certain amount of humour milked from the arch 1930s dialogue and some of the physical slapstick is a little overdone in a few moments, the majority of the show sticks amazingly closely to the original film, and gets most of its gags from the wonderfully bizarre methods used to do this kind of ‘running man’ thriller on the stage. We get cast members posing as bits of the landscape, a dizzying train sequence where two actors are playing six seperate roles depending on which hat they’re wearing at the time, and some gloriously loopy bits of shadowplay, including a North by North-West parodying sequence that comes complete with bi-plane crash! It’s the kind of theatre that I love- using very simple devices and props to create a world (particularly in the chase sequences, which are made up of clouds of smoke and characters running around waving torches) and the whole thing is tremendously inventive, while always poking fun at the sheer ridiculousness of trying to produce a film like this with four people. Tremendous fun, and leaves the admittedly entertaining but downright bloated Spamalot in the shade. If films are going to be adapted for the stage, this is the way people should be doing them…

    Underground delays meant we arrived in the auditorium with only seconds to spare, but we both had a fantastic time, and our journey home seemed to be going smoothly- until we got to Waterloo, and found that a ‘suspect package’ meant the entire mainline terminal had been shut down. When you’re trying to get back to darkest Hampshire, that’s not the kind of problem that’s easy to think around. It was 5.30pm, and rush hour was starting to descend, and I will admit that I flaked out a little- but thankfully George was a lot more sensible, and got us onto a bus to Clapham Junction, which was an odd experience as I haven’t been there for almost eight years since I lived in Battersea. There, we were able to leap on a train to Woking, and were soon on our way home- where I was hoping to find my mobile phone, as I’d found it missing on the train into London, and was hoping I’d left it in my office. It wasn’t in my office, however. It wasn’t anywhere in the house. The damn thing was gone, and I didn’t know what to do. So, I called the phone, in the hope of hearing a distant ‘brrr brr’ that I could track- but instead, someone answered. After a couple of confused attempts, it turns out that it was my neighbours two doors down- it had fallen out of my pocket somewhere in the drive, and they’d found it. Thanks to the weather, it had gotten seriously rained on, but- in a wonderfully bizarre twist- we actually have a spare phone that was exactly the same model, so all I had to do was swap the Sim Cards and all was well. Breathing a sigh of relief, we collapsed onto the sofa for a Chinese meal, and four episodes of the early eighties TV adaptation of Jane Eyre (starring Timothy Dalton in full gothich brooding mode as Rochester), and spent most of the time goggling at the jaw-dropping number of bonnets on display, or making pithy comments when the moment was right.

    All in all, a fine way of spending our third anniversary. And now, for the day after… I’m back doing sub-editing.

    Hey ho…

  • TV EYE: Chuck, Reaper, Bionic Woman, Life, Journeyman

    At least for now, I’ve got so many TV shows to deal with that I’m only just managing to keep up with them all, which is a nice feeling. It’s time for plenty of second episodes, and I’ll be changing the format of these reviews slightly, mainly because many of these episodes share the same kind of problems. Despite some outstanding moments, I have yet to be completely blown away by any of the new US Network shows moving past their pilots (I have my fingers crossed that Pushing Daisies can build on its wacky pilot, rather than peaking way too early), and none of them have yet entered the realm of absolute must-see… Fear the spoilers…

  • TV EYE: Moonlight, Ugly Betty, Gossip Girl, Dexter

    The tidal wave continues to crash. We’ll soon be getting into the follow-ups to the pilots that I’ve reviewed (plus the odd after-effects and altered elements- especially the fact that, in Bionic Woman, Jaime Summers’ grumpy deaf sister has now been transformed into a different grumpy computer-hacking-addicted sister. Hmm…), but here’s a new show, a couple of returning treats, and more delirious teen trash. Fear the spoilers…

    ‘You see, it’s Angel meets… er… Angel! Doesn’t it sound fabulous?!?’ ‘Er…’

  • TV EYE: Heroes- episode 2

    Another week, another Heroes episode– another raised eyebrow and exclamation of “Hmmmm….” Fear the spoilers…

  • TV EYE: “Heroes” Season 2 begins…

    This is going to have to be a short one, as I’m relentlessly busy, but wanted to at least jot down a few thoughts on the Heroes 2nd season premiere. Fear the spoilers…

  • TV EYE: Damages, Gossip Girl, Flash Gordon, Californication

    The new season is here– and of course, thanks to being ridiculously ahead, I’ve now got the slight annoyance of having to wait another week to get to episodes of the new shows I haven’t seen yet (although I may watch Reaper again, simply to see how it’s been changed thanks to the main ‘girlfriend’ role being recast from Thirteen star and co-writer Nikki Reed to Heroes’ ex-shapechanger Missy Peregrym). Despite this, there’s still some new TV to discuss, so once more unto the breach, dear friends. Fear the spoilers…

    ‘You know you love me. And who am I? I’m the Artist Formerly Known as Veronica Mars…’

  • Dazed and Confused

    Four hours of sleep followed by six hours solid driving isn’t the best way of going about things. LadyGeorge, as she is sometimes known, is now off having fun in Sweeden for the next few days, after which she’ll be off to Finland. Her flight was 7AM from Stansted Airport, which involved traversing the London Orbital Motorway known as the M25 at about 4 in the morning. This in itself wasn’t too bad. What turned out to be a problem was getting back– from mistakenly not refilling the petrol when I could have done, to the service station that let people queue up for petrol pumps and only told anyone that they were only taking cash via a handwritten sign of the pumps, to the point where my car’s engine decided to start impersonating one of the finer examples of the Great Western Railway steam age, it was somewhat of a saga. At one point, I found myself driving somewhere near Slough, desperate for a petrol station, and praying to any deity who might be listening- not a good place to be dealing with sleep deprivation. Nevertheless, I got through it all, collapsed in a heap at home, and then had to go and carry out all kinds of missions in Alton. I’ve got four days of subbing from tomorrow– I’ll be up at 6.30 am, so I need to be in bed soon. I’d like a chance to catch my breath, but I’m not sure I’m going to get one. Hey ho…

  • Tunnel’s End.

    It’s done. The novel is done. I’ve finished the lengthy process of checking through The Hypernova Gambit, and there’s really nothing more I can learn from this, and nothing more I can do to it without help. There’s some reformatting and tidying to do, now that I’ve gotten it into one big file, but it’s complete. Unless I’ve got a very good reason, the project officially ends here, and I don’t think I’ve quite got my head around it. The bottle of champagne I’ve kept around for this occasion should hopefully help me with that when I crack it open later, but at the moment, I’m somewhat shell-shocked.

    I’m also mildly horrified that in the last rewrite, despite going all-out to trim the fat, up the pace and remove any unnecessary digressions… the wordcount has gone up. And not by anything small. My last total, back on March 13th, was 150, 867 words. Now, the grand total (and, frankly, where it’s staying unless I’ve got some serious motivation) is:

    164,917 words

    I’ve created a monster. And the thing is- having just spent the last week solidly trudging through it… I know there isn’t really anything I can lose. It’s a wild, entertaining romp- it’s just also a terribly intricate entertaining romp, with stuff going on at almost every step of the way. Despite the increase in size, I’m still immensely proud of what I’ve done, and there’s no way I’m looking at this and going “Well, that’s enough for one lifetime”. Getting here may have taken longer than I expected, but now I’m here, I’m not going to stop. I have someone in publishing who’s interested in looking at it (admittedly, not for the next month, but publishing is always like that…), and after a short break and some subbing work next week, I’m going to finally decide what needs to be done next, and do it.

    This is just the first step of the journey. I’ve no idea where it’s going to lead me, but I’m going there all the same…

  • The Light at the End of the Tunnel

    Life related updates have been a little short recently– but, I felt it was important to record that I am actually, genuinely, definitely in the final stages of the novel. The point where the book goes from ‘pending project’ to ‘something I’ll need a very good reason to tinker with’ is not that far away. I’m currently going through the ‘final draft’ version of the book, checking my English, restructuring some of my habitually overcomplicated sentences, and running it through a spell checker. I’m up to chapter 9, and I”m doing very little else this week other than getting this novel finished. There’s a lot of pages to go before the end (I have to try and average two chapters a day), but it’s an odd feeling, finally getting it to a point where I know there’s nothing I can do about it. Then, of course, I enter the risky world of actually sending the thing out… but for now, a big celebration isn’t too far away.

    Tick, tock, tick tock…

  • Stardust Memories

    I saw Stardust last night. Despite relatively liking it when I came out, despite its many faults… let’s just say that it’s gone down in my estimation in the last twenty four hours. I love fantasy movies– but I really didn’t like this enough. Fear the spoilers…

    ‘You see, it’s The Princess Bride meets Midnight Run! Doesn’t it sound FABULOUS?’ ‘Er…’